Sage Advice 55: Expressions Of The Past
It’s always good to take a look back and see how you have developed as a human being. I do this by looking at my various artistic endeavors throughout the years. I compare how my illustrative abilities have progressed and whether or not they have informed my current projects. Here’s a fun game! How about you guys check out some of my art for me. Then try to guess how old I was when I...
Sage Advice 54: The Best Liars
The most tragically horrible type of person is the acting type. Actors pretty much spend their entire time telling you they are someone they aren’t, have never been, and will never be. Then, if they’re good at it, they get trophies and more money an hour than any doctor, teacher, scientist, or warlord could ever dream. Well maybe not more than warlords. Mass murder is a pretty...
Sound Advice 15: Childrens Television Just a...
Sage Advice 53: I'm Swimming Towards Pie
I’m convinced that, at some point in history, fast-food chains and brand-name clothing companies worked together. Let’s think about this. Brand-name clothes seem to be all about the name; everyone wants to know they’re wearing the most popular or expensive labels available. Considering this, it would be safe to assume that the creator’s of such clothing would want their label easily identified on...
Sage Advice 52: The Pride Is Back
The other day I saw a woman wearing a shirt that read, in large brightly colored words, “WARNING: Educated Black Woman.” What a terrific shirt! Just through the medium of polyester and blinding letters this lady had managed to express the social and personal obstacles she had overcome throughout her trials and tribulations. She was proud to have beaten the statistics that told her she was doomed,...
Sound Advice 14: International Relations P.S. ...
Sage Advice 51: Setting a Cave on Fire
I was recently brushing up on my Ancient Greek philosophy trivia when I came across Plato’s “I’m Like in a Cave or Something and Stuff is on Fire” analogy. It’s an intriguing thought; the idea of our knowledge of existence only being as deep as the shadows cast on a wall from a fire. It’s a shame that it’s complete bullshit. Not the philosophy behind it, but the historical understanding of the...
Sage Advice 50: Cancer
Have you ever wondered what cancer would be like if it was a person? It’s an interesting thought; what would something that plagues living beings so viciously be like if it was more like the living beings it viciously plagued. I think, first and foremost, cancer would be an asshole. It is an asshole of a disease. Cancer just sneaks up when it’s uninvited, attacks some part of your body you assume...
Sound Advice 13: Critically Critique
Sound Advice 12: The Beat
Sage Advice 49: Sloths
Probably the best animal in the world is the sloth. Did I say probably? I meant to say definitely. And did I say animal? Because I meant to say thing. And did I say sloth? I meant to say sloth. I should really stop second guessing myself. Anywho, the sloth’s greatness as a creature is really undermined by its name. Sloth. Do you know what that means? I’m not sure either, but I know...
Sage Advice 48: Pretend Life Is A Baby Animal
Human response to nature is always an interesting topic. I was surfing around the internet, doing internety things like pirating DVD rips of the first two seasons of Becker and looking up the name of that band that had a drummer with one arm (turns out it’s TLC), when I saw a fascinating article about a baby bear.* This baby bear frequented a camping ground in a park reservation. Tourists would...
Sage Advice 47: The Chinchilla's Den
I like music. I realize how specific of a sentence that is, but allow me to magnify my interest with an exhausted recount of my all time favorite band. This is a group that has performed songs that have touched the heart, soul, mind, and rectum of various periods of my life. I hope you take an interest in this band and pursue their musical endeavors. The Chinchilla’s Den Started in the mid 1960s,...